Stronger than a little bad habit

Well team, the battle seems to have reared its ugly head once again.  It almost seems like it goes in waves, but I think I've lost my grip on it.  I think I have let it over take me.  I've let it bubble up to the surface and have control. Well I don't think a bad habit, an addiction, an OCD, or whatever it is should have that kind of power over me.  I am stronger than a little bad habit, and I am not going to allow it to run my life.  For so long I've just defined myself by a bad habit.  A picker.  I am what I do.  I pick, I am a picker.  Wow, have I been lying to myself for a while now.  Where the heck has that gotten me???  Well here's what I have to say to you, you terrible thoughts....YOU ARE CAPTIVE NOW! I've always heard that verse in church about capturing every negative thought and holding it captive to Christ, but now I think I know what it really means.  I am not what I do, I do what I am.  I am not A Picker.  I am a child of God who picks.  That is such a better way of seeing it, so freeing.  When I look at it that way, it feels like I have the choice in this.  I am not a victim of my circumstances, I don't need to dig at my flesh to feel alive, to wake up to the world, or to drift off to sleep in it.  My hands can do so much more.  I can do so much more.  I have been holding myself back, hiding away, staying in the shadows of my embarrassment.   All the foundation and powder in the world can't cover what I'm really hiding. Short and sweet tonight, because it's late and I'm hoping, with the strength and the Grace of God, this could be my last entry.  Could every entry from here on out be of my success?  Of my power and my beauty? My boldness and security in who I am? I think so, because I know who I am.  And who I really am is SO MUCH better than the lie.